Is it just me or am I preoccupied with the big questions? When will this pandemic end, when can we go back to a semblance of normality ? Why are British people continuing to support and vote for such a self serving bunch as the Conservatives. Why do you vote for them? Answer- Because it isn’t in my being to support them. Are the British people anaesthetised into believing flag waving bigots have our collective well being foremost in their minds?
So whilst the big things rattle around in my head, consuming my will to make something better; the small things go by unnoticed. Well, unnoticed by me anyway. I look after my granddaughter every week and am there to see her grow and and change. It takes me back to my time bringing up my children. I got so engrossed in the minutiae of their lives, the big events were almost invisible. First words, steps, smiles, all meant a huge amount. I listened to music that moved me in a way I find hard today. The small things ruled my world and I was pleased that it was so.
Maybe it is the nature of the pandemic? It is after all world wide, it touches every corner of the globe and every strata of every society. You can’t run away from it or pretend it isn’t there. You could I suppose but you would end up as deluded as those who deny the existence of Coronavirus and the need to wear masks/have a vaccine. You may as well add a few conspiracy theories to support your ridiculous assertions and blame someone for its name. You could go further and deny the existence of climate change, poverty, racism. You could carry on as if none of the worlds most pressing problems are not really pressing. You decide to not wear a mask and lo and behold, you have to explain why every time you want to go into a shop or pub. You won’t have the vaccine because Bill Gates has implanted microchips in it and you will be under his supreme control. This of course requires you to explain how this is possible and what he hopes to achieve with this global cunning plan. The effort required to go against the flow must be exhausting. These may be your small things and how you deal with the big stuff.
To be surrounded by the big things every day can be overwhelming so we do what we can. We put out the recycling, wear masks and get vaccinated. We hope that millions of small things will make one big thing. Global corporations promise grand schemes to do their part. Often, they amount to shuffling deckchairs on the Titanic and will never commit their profits to the greater good. They pledge enough to get the rest of us off their backs for their obscene wealth and profits. Governments should be doing the big things as they supposedly speak for us. We see in the UK, a government who first will protect and preserve themselves, their wealth and privilege; before ever doing a good deed for us. Every step they take is carefully designed to make us believe they care when in truth; we know they couldn’t care less unless it affects them directly. Government is not just about governing; it is about remaining in government.
This is all very cynical and jaded. I am about to be 57 tomorrow. I have learned a few things in those 57 years. That history repeats itself. That we should hope for better and be wary of grand promises. I have to stop to look at what I can do to make a difference. I can’t solve the pandemic, can’t undo climate change single handedly, can’t vote the Tories out on my own. I have to believe that only the combined effort of millions of small acts will change the big things. It should be about waking up to a warm summers day. to the sound of granddaughter laughing, the opening chord of a great song. It should be about reading or occasionally, writing a poem that touches me. Instead, I am cloaked in big things which cuts out the light that would otherwise shine on these small moments and experiences.
The small things can also irritate, can take up time you would otherwise use for more positive small things. They tie you up, make you feel as if they are there deliberately to annoy you. I’m saying you but really its me. I own my annoyances, my irritations. I get too easily distracted by minor itches that just have to be scratched. These are not the small things I wish to experience but they are what they are. I would have hope that my 57 years have taught me not to get pissed off with them but I still do.
The moral of this tale is; appreciate the little moments that bring the light in, do your bit to the right thing and try not to get sidetracked by the wrong things. The big stuff will ultimately evolve, we just have to each help it along a bit. do you bit to preserve the environment, vote for decent people and wear a mask/get the vaccine. These are tangible, they are achievable, they are within our reach.
The John Linney 